Give the dog a bone

Written on the wall of the drop-in centre/homeless hostel on Holyrood Road, just a stone’s throw from the Holyrood Tavern, this one opens up a whole can of Pandora’s worms. Is it a comment on Stuart? Is it an order to Stuart? Or could it be a confession by Stuart?

Let's make an assumption here. Let’s assume that Stuart, whoever he is, didn't actually commit an act of despicable wrongness with a real, four-legged, tail-wagging, barking dog, before deciding to brag about it on a wall. It has to therefore be a comment by one of his pals, using the metaphor of a dog as a method of ridiculing one of Stuart’s legitimate sexual conquests. The case against him collapses, so Stuart walks from The Filthy Pen's court a free man, his reputation sullied but intact.

There’s a potential problem though. What if Stuart was guilty as charged? We’ve acquitted him, and now he could be biding his time, preparing to strike again. No dog is in the land is safe. Oh my God what have we done?

Sherlock Holmes tells Watson that one should never assume, only deduce. But even Sherlock can only deduce when he has enough clues, and there’s not much to go on here. That’s one of the problems with graffiti, sometimes less isn’t more. Sometimes less just ain't enough.